The R Word, and why it’s awful


I pray this picture brings you as much joy as it does me.  It was take a few years ago at the Dallas Arboretum, which I highly recommend visiting before pumpkin season is over.  This is my sister Holly and she has cerebral palsy.  Although it takes a village to care for someone with a disability, I can truly say that she is a blessing in disguise.

She has made me a more compassionate, patient, and unselfish human being.  She has shown me what love really is, not the kind of love you feel when things are going right, but the love you feel when its hard to give up your life to care for someone else.  She has shown me what its like to love everyone regardless of what they have to offer, she has truly never met a stranger.  Holly has shaped me in more ways than I can express and in ways I’m sure I may never even know.  She is an angel as are so many of children and adults like her to their families.

Holly is the reason I would like you to removed the word RETARDED from your vocabulary.  It is very hurtful when I hear someone say this and they are being vulgar or using it in a demeaning way.  I try to have grace because I know the majority of the time they don’t mean it that way, but it still hurts.

When I worked at the Down Syndrome Partnership, I learned a lot about people first language.  I have to admit I was still saying the words, “disabled person”.  However the correct way to speak about a person with disabilities is to say, “child/adult with a disability, or child/adult with Down Syndrome, child/adult who has cerebral palsy.”  The incorrect ways are, “mentally retarded, mentally challenged, retarded, mentally off, handicap, slow, etc.”

I want to thank you for reading this post, and for wanting to learn how to respect and honor those with disabilities and also their loved ones.  I pray that as you take this word out of your vocabulary that you are blessed as well.  My hope is you will also share this with someone else, because together we can bring so much awareness and hope for these beautiful angels.

~Happy Growing My Friends!

Please like & share:

  5 comments for “The R Word, and why it’s awful

  1. Zeke Sanchez
    November 19, 2015 at 4:42 am

    I like Holly, even though I’ve never really met her I’ve seen her, if I remember once at Refuge…unfortunately I did not round up enough courage to even aproch y’all, but instead just smile from a distance. I believe that I’ve been reminded by her picture that Gods’ beautiful finger prints are all over this picture an image of truth & outstanding grace, just like an awesome bit of petrichor as it fills our scence of smell so profound yet missed or taken for granted. Stay blessed and that smile is the truth to #smilemorethanoften

    • frida82
      November 30, 2015 at 8:38 pm

      thank you so much Zeke!

  2. November 19, 2015 at 7:15 pm


    What are the parallels of the conversions to Jesus Christ on the Day of Pentecost and that of the conversion of the apostle Paul on the road to Damascus?

    1. At Pentecost they believed Jesus was Lord And Christ.(Acts 2:36)
    Paul believe Jesus was Lord.(Acts 9:4-5)

    2. At Pentecost they asked what they should do. (Acts 2:37)

    Paul asked “Lord what do you want me to do”(Acts 9:6)

    3. At Pentecost, the 3000 repented, and were immersed in water for the forgiveness of their sins and then they received the gift of the Holy Spirit.(Acts 2:38)

    Paul went to Damascus where he was baptized in water for the forgiveness of his sins and he was filled with the Holy Spirit. Acts 22:16,Acts 9:17-18)

    Paul’s sins were not forgiven “on the road” to Damascus, they were forgiven in Damascus.(Acts 22:10-16)

    Paul was not filled with the Holy Spirit “on the road” to Damascus. He was filled with the Holy Spirit in Damascus. (Acts 9:10-19)

    Paul believed that Jesus was Lord “on the road’ to Damascus, however, he was not saved from his sins on the road nor was he filled with the Holy Spirit on the road.(Acts 9:3-9)

    Paul was saved in Damascus. He was not saved on the road to Damascus. He was NOT SAVED BEFORE HE WAS BAPTIZED IN WATER! You cannot be saved until your sins have been forgiven.


  3. August 1, 2016 at 12:09 am

    This is a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing your sister with us.

    • frida82
      August 24, 2016 at 6:23 pm

      Thank you so much Sarah!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *